Saturday, January 28, 2012

I wish I had a cool name like Sheridan French.

Alas, I do not. My name is Megan, plain and simple. Not even an "h" to fancify it.

The thing is, though, I do not wish to have Sheridan French's life. I don't know if it was Pinterest, Facebook, or simply blogs in general, but there seems to be a celebri-storm brewing and it is kicking up many Bloggers and thrusting them into some sort of spotlight.

If a piece of footwear/hoisery were to represent my life, this is it.
 Big and cozy, practical,cute and sweet but not especially sexy.
 I'm an enormous pair of wool socks and dammit, that's good enough!
Magazine features. Guest spots on HGTV and The Today Show segments.

They all have blowouts. Immacuately manicured nails. And perfect, fairytale lives full of carb-free diets, shamrock-green lawns rimmed with diamond-topped white picket fences, and CrossFit workouts. Their children never fuss, nap for five hours a day, and they are budding entrepreneuers with Hedge Fund manager husbands of New England bloodlines.

Who are these people?!

I wonder if these are their real lives or their For Show lives. The Internet does make it terribly convenient, if not inviting, to portray one's self in an exaggerated version. Be it towards the OH, God and the Universe Piss on me Everyday direction or the I Poop Daisies and When I Roll Over at 7am to Kiss My Studmuffin Husband, My Breath Smells like Candycanes direction.

Life as a professional ass kisser nanny tells me that, most likely, these are their For Show lives. These are the lives that mask the reality, but the reality is no fun to read about. Piles of dirty laundry, minivans with 119,632 miles on them, and once-a-month sex lives do not celebri-bloggers make.

The Sheridan French Shoe.
It does not stop us real people from longing after imaginary lives. I see these women and so badly want to live their life for a day. Partly because their jewelry sparkles a whole lot more than mine, but mostly because I know that I'm well-equipped to tackle the REAL dirt beneath the glitz. Thereby making the glossy surface that much more enjoyable.

That's God's sense of humor for ya! Just as.... less attractive and sometimes heavier than most.. girls often have to fall back on being abnormally funny, there is always a rub. There is always a tradeoff. We must not have it all.

My comfort will have to be found in knowing that even the Sheridan French's do not have it all. To be me-- Megan, simpleton from Iowa-- will have to do.

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